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Somehow we as a society have come to believe that love is a given based on the nature of some relationships. The idea that family is forever, a mother’s love is unconditional, blood is thicker than water, etc, etc, have created a false sense of what love actually is.

For those whose blood-based connections are anything less than supportive and loving, there is a feeling of inadequacy and loss. If you were raised up to feel that love is conditional, you’re left with only yourself to blame when that love is withheld. Hallmark cards covered with quotes glorifying a mother’s love, sibling connections, and the ever present bond of family, only add insult to injury.

In reality, some of the deepest pain is inflicted by the closest relationships. Family is not necessarily forever, some mothers love conditionally, and blood has little to do with how we treat each other. This idea of “family equals love” has created an entitlement attitude where relatives carelessly take each other for granted.

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Love doesn’t hurt.

The bottom line is this: If it hurts, it isn’t love. It matters not at all who the relationship is with. Call it something else, but don’t call it love.

Love comes from within and radiates out. Love yourself enough that you no longer allow those without love for you to affect your sense of self. Ultimately, it has little to do with you. Surround yourself with those who radiate love and the family you were born to be a part of will emerge. ❤

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